資料來源：親職教育專家Ken Sir
父母可能會擔心對孩子表達過多的愛，會造成溺愛，因而不懂如何對孩子表達愛。一般而言，中國人較為內斂，對愛的表現很多時候都不敢說出來。尤其當你本來想表達你很緊張他，但往往變成另一種態度。
有次我在沙田見到一個媽媽和她的小朋友走失了，然後再重聚，重聚後媽媽的表現是怎樣呢？就是捉著他的手打他 ，一邊打一邊説：「我剛剛見不到你，你知不知道我很害怕。我很擔心你，見不到你怎麽辦呀？」
其實大家都知道媽媽是愛他的，但小朋友就感受不到。我經常在講座分享一個例子去表達愛，就是在我小時候爸爸叫了一杯飲料，因為當時錢不多，當叫完一杯熱飲後就問侍應多拿一個杯子。在我面前不停把飲料倒來倒去，想盡快把飲料弄涼，讓小朋友喝的時候不會燙傷嘴巴，而且可以快點喝得到，但我發現如果當小朋友問父母的時候或我問過很多學生的父母，他們都是會答：「這樣會快點變涼。」
Source: Parenting Education Specialist, Ken Sir
Parents may worry that expressing too much love to their children will spoil them and therefore do not know how to express love to them. Generally speaking, Chinese are more introverted and often dare not express their love. Especially when you originally wanted to express that you were very worried about your child, it often turns into another attitude.
Once, I saw a mother and her child get lost in Shatin and then reunite. What was the mother’s behavior like after the reunion? She grabbed the child’s hand and hit him while saying, “I couldn’t find you earlier; do you know how scared I was? I was so worried. What would I do if I didn’t find you?”
In fact, everyone knows that the mother loves her child, but the child doesn’t feel it. I often share an example during lectures to express love. When I was young, my father ordered a drink, but because money was tight, he asked the waiter to bring an extra cup after ordering one hot drink. He kept pouring the drink back and forth in front of me, trying to cool it down quickly so that the child wouldn’t burn his mouth and could drink it faster. But I found that when children ask their parents or when I asked many students’ parents, they would answer, “This will make it cool faster.”
家長在回應小朋友時應該表達最深的層次，就是因為我愛你，我不愛你我怎麽會做這事情呢？難道我為旁邊那個做？為旁邊的小朋友做嗎？所以其實我們在生活上很多事情可以表達愛，但有一種事一定要記住，如果你害怕造成溺愛，一定要切記以下兩點。
第一點小朋友可以做到的事，應該要讓他做，你不應該爭著做。第二點就是小朋友犯錯，我們要指正他。在指正的過程中，盡量用到溫柔而堅定，需要嚴肅的時候要嚴肅。但要提醒小朋友記著要説上解決方法，而不是只說NO，只說不對。這樣的話，小朋友是不會進步的。
When responding to children, parents should express their feelings at the deepest level: “I love you; why would I do this if I didn’t love you? Am I doing it for someone else? For another child? So in fact, there are many things in our lives that can express love, but there is one thing that must be remembered. If you are afraid of being overindulgent, remember the following two points:
First, if the child can do something, let them do it. You should not fight to do it. Second, when the child makes a mistake, we should correct them. In the process of correction, try to be gentle and firm. When seriousness is needed, be serious. But remind the child to say the solution, not just say no or that it’s wrong. Otherwise, the child will not progress.
