資料來源：精神科專科梁婉珊醫生
每次送小朋友上學，小朋友都哭個不停，與媽媽難捨難離，這可能是缺乏安全感的警號。很多研究指出，安全的依附關係（secure
attachment ）是小朋友長大的成功基礎。家長可以如何與小朋友建立安全的依附關係呢？
其實一段安全的依附關係（secure
attachment ）是需要刻意經營，需要媽媽很多的努力，要投放很多心機心力。小朋友對世界的信任，是否有自信，也跟與媽媽有沒有安全的依附關係息息相關。
當小朋友沒有安全感，最常見是難以與媽媽分離。一般小朋友與媽媽分開時，會哭鬧一下，只要安撫一下便會冷靜下來。但安全感建立不穩的小朋友，會出現嚴重哭鬧情況，很快便會有脾氣，這便是一個警號，家長便要努力建立安全感。
Source: Specialist in psychiatry, Dr. Leung Yuen Shan
Every time the child is sent to school, they cry non-stop and have a difficult time separating from their mother. This may be a sign of a lack of security. Many studies have shown that a secure attachment is a foundation for a child’s success in life. How can parents establish a secure attachment with their children?
In fact, a secure attachment requires deliberate effort and a lot of hard work from the mother. A child’s trust in the world and their own confidence are closely related to their secure attachment to their mother.
When a child doesn’t feel safe, they usually have trouble being apart from their mother. Usually, when a child is separated from their mother, they may cry and fuss a bit but can be easily calmed down. However, a child with an unstable sense of security may become very upset and throw tantrums quickly. This is a sign that parents need to work on establishing a sense of security.
如何建立安全感？首先媽媽要照顧好自己，媽媽的精神健康是所有事情的基礎。媽媽照顧不好自己，也無力照顧孩子。如果發現自己的情緒真係出現了問題，情緒波幅大、易怒、易哭、失眠或無法進食，為孩子將來著想，便要盡快處理。
小朋友在一直成長中都會持續建立對世界和人的安全感和信任。父母在孩子的童年階段持續給予回應和關注，多與小朋友建立親子時間，透過不同的活動增加親子親密的交流，都是讓他對世界更有信心和安全感的方法。
So, how can parents establish a sense
of security? First of all, the mother must take care of herself. The mother’s
mental health is the foundation of everything. If the mother is not taking good
care of herself, she will not be able to take care of her child. If she finds
that she has a real emotional problem, such as high mood swings, irritability,
crying, insomnia, or the inability to eat, she should deal with it as soon as
possible for the sake of the child’s future.
Children are constantly building a
sense of security and trust in the world and people as they grow. Parents can
continue to respond to and pay attention to their children during their
childhood and establish more parent-child time through different activities to
increase intimate communication. All of these efforts can help the child build
confidence and a sense of security in the world.
